Leading Competently with the Language of Leadership September 26, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Lessons in Leadership, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.add a comment
The role of a leader is to lead. Sounds like a no-brainer huh? What is a leader if nobody chooses to follow him?
I was once told by my platoon commander when I was serving the Singapore Armed Forces that “the biggest fear a leader is to look over his shoulders and realise that nobody is following him”.
That day was the last day I left the camp and green uniform behind. But the words have stuck with me since.
In essence, it truly highlights the principle that “A Leader is only a Leader when there are people Following him”, and that a Leader is nothing without without his followers and supporters.
That begs the second question then: Why do people follow anyone else?
There are several reasons for this. But without going too deep into philosophy and/or sociology, I think that people generally follow somebody else’s lead because it is perceived that the everybody can get the job done in a better fashion.
Mind you, this does not naturally mean that the hearts and mind of the people are won and that they would follow somebody wholeheartedly. Seldom do we see something like that happen.
The power of leadership may come as a “natural endowment”, ie, people vest their trust and loyalty upon a leader voluntarily. Others may come as a form of “vested authority”, ie, authority is delegated and the leader is appointed. In effect, you can interpret it as empowerment through democracy and/or authoritative means. Each method has its merits and I won’t go into detail about that.
Yet, like it or not, a leader has to be able to wield an appropriate degree of the various leadership tools that are of both “democratic” and “authoritative” nature from time to time to get their work done.
Having worked with a fair deal of people of who were stepping into leadership roles without extensive experience of handling mega projects prior to their latest appointments, I had a quite a good time observing the similarities and differences that lie behind what makes a competent and experienced leader.
The way they communicate is one such difference. Here are some communication principles that separate competent leaders from inexperienced ones:
Why Struggle When You Can Share? August 15, 2009
Posted by Gary in Articles, Dealing with People, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.1 comment so far
Dare to Share
I got to read a really touching story in the local newspaper lately which really reminded me of the time I spent with my mother too. (See post)
Besides reminding me of my own story, I thought this article might be a worthy read for you too. Take some time to read the article below and reflect upon it and your life.
Here it is… (more…)
iImpressed @ iPresent 2009 August 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.2 comments
iPresent 2009
The bustling streets, fervor activity. I’ve long heard about their friendliness, sincerity and enthusiasm at learning. But none had really prepared me for the scenes I was to see, yet alone be part of.
I’m of course, talking about my latest training adventure at Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam.
Organised by a team of passionate and dedicated Vietnamese students, the iPresent,iLead workshop was incepted to address the mismatch of skills between young graduates and the demands of fast changing Vietnam labor market. Communication and presentation skills (hence iPresent) was identified as one of the key areas that they sought to shore up.
And boy did we have fun… training, I mean *winks*.
Over two days, two hundred students walked through the gates of the Ho Chi Minh University of Economics to gather skills on How to Overcome their Fears of Public Speaking, How to Craft an Impactful Speech, and How to Make Body Language Work For You. (more…)
5 Essential Principles You Must Know For Success on Stage July 3, 2009
Posted by Gary in Coaching, Events & Experiences, Personal Development, PowerPoint & Presentation, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.Tags: Coaching
1 comment so far
Courtesy of Flikr and "the monk"
I was coaching a friend on public speaking a couple of weeks back when we were addressing about her public speaking anxiety. In her own words, her mind would go blank, she’d freeze and get paralyzed, and she’d suffer from panic attacks thinking about her impending doom… erm… I mean presentation *winks* for weeks to come.
Sounds familiar?
Anyway, we were talking and analyzing her anxiety attacks when it dawned upon me that she held several misconceptions and “displaced faith” towards public speaking.
Now let me clarify, she’s an educated, insightful intelligent and hardworking individual who knows what she wants and what she’s doing. The only problem is that she’s been so active at avoiding speaking up for so long now that she’s forgotten how speak!
In fact, I even remarked (to her) that she has been doing a great job at whatever she’s been doing for the past couple of years! Just think about it – She’s been so successful hiding, she’s successfully taught herself to run away from speaking!
Still, more importantly, the insights and concerns she shared with me about her fear, however, helped me crystallize some of the major lessons I’ve learned about public speaking and the concept of fear! And I thought it would be great to share them with you too!
So here it goes: (more…)
Six Speaking Skills You Need For Managing a Crisis June 1, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, Public Speaking, Sales & Persuasion, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Toastmasters.add a comment
I got the privilege of evaluating an advanced project during a meeting at Tampines Changkat Toastmasters Club this evening. The project was on “Crisis Management”. The speaker was expected chair a media conference and deliver an official statement addressing a crisis that had struck the organization that he was working for. Thereafter, he would be required to chair a question and answer session from members of the media – tough interrogators who are hungry for sound bites and hawkish for answers.
The speaker had to be on his toes and watch what he said – for any slip could further stoke the flames and potentially devastate the company further.
The speaker who attempted this project for the night, Gregory Ernoult, ACB, managed this challenge admirably. In fact, it was such an admirable attempt that it helped to surface a few pertinent points in crisis/media management and prompted me to blog about it (for you) too!
Since it’s close to 4am, and I’m too tired and lazy to think of an alternative structure to share those ideas, I shall proceed simply by sharing the three main areas Greg did particularly well in followed by the three suggestions I thought he could use to enhance his presentation and Q&A. But before we begin, we’ll have to understand the setting for his “crisis” first. (more…)
The AWARE Saga – Prelude to Leadership Fatalities May 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Videos & Podcast.add a comment
Courtesy of Lucious Young
Those of you who’re in Singapore would be no stranger to the AWARE saga – an event (or some say coup) involving a Civil Society in Singapore that caught the young nation’s attention.
For those of you who are (*ahem*) unAWARE (pardon the pun), of what this is about, you may read on to find out more. Otherwise, you may skip this prelude to proceed straight to the lessons on Leadership Fatalities
Leadership Fatalities – 5 Mistakes a Leader Must Never Make! May 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Videos & Podcast.3 comments
Image Courtesy of Channel NewsAsia
“The feeling in the room was electrifying. I still can’t get over the fact that we got Aware back. It is a great moral victory.”
- Constance Singam, past president of Aware
You would probably know the story by know. But I’d like to take the analysis of the Old Guard’s victory one step further and examine it under the microscope of communication and the fatal mistakes the New Guard made as leaders – for your benefit of course. (*winks*)
The following are 5 Leadership Fatalities that a leader must NEVER make: (more…)
Susan Boyle: A Story of Talent, Persistance and Belief April 21, 2009
Posted by Gary in General, Hope & Inspiration, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs, Videos & Podcast.1 comment so far
Who is Susan Boyle?
If I’ve said it once, I’ve must have said it a thousand times: our mindset is fundamental to our success and failure.
Wouldn’t you agree?
Our mindsets pave the way for us to move forward, allows us to pursue opportunities and open up new doors to progress… and overcome adversity and challenges.
Talent, skill and ability are irrelevant if one does not have the right attitude and mindset…
Never mind that one may harbor false hopes and misplaced beliefs every now and then – making mistakes is just another way of learning. But it’s my assertion and belief that you’ll never know until you do attempt it.
It takes courage, definitely. But you’ll be surprised what gems or golden opportunities you might uncover because you dared to venture into places that others fear to thread.
And there’s no simply no stopping you when your talent and abilities meet the opportunity.
This lady in the following video offers such a case in point. She’s almost half a century old, unemployed, and has never had the opportunity to pursue her dream of singing. And as compared to the divas that grace the stages in the modern entertainment industry… she is by far less endowed.
She is Susan Boyle – a singer-wannabe who made her an appearance on stage during the talent show Britain’s Got Talent. She was asked to share her dream – she replied: to be like Elaine Paige, a famous English singer and actress.
The judges were unconvinced. The audience laughed. Some smirked. Too many wannabes had come, boasted and failed.
Would she be another William Hung who had truly believed that in what he had to give? Let’s find out: (more…)
Shy Speaker’s Interview on Radio 938Live – Q&A to Share! November 1, 2008
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.add a comment
Behind the scenes at 93.9Live
And so we have it! The author of this blog got to share his views on public speaking on national radio! Now how many speakers can claim to have done that! (*winks*)
Alright, just let me bask in that moment of glory for awhile I revel in that experience. Well, to say the least, it was a really eventful experience. I was told by Stanley, the presenter and producer of the talkshow: The Living Room, to standby for a few calls to come in – it’s a Live show after all – but not to keep my hopes too up high because listeners usually don’t. He went on to add that listeners usually only call when there’s a health expert on the show…
Oh well, what the heck. Not that it really mattered. Stanley had already prepared a list of questions to ask me anyway… and so we began.
If the old adage that “Public Speaking is number one fear that supersedes the fear of death” is anything to go by, this interview certainly proved it. Because we had… not one – but two listeners who called with questions for me! Imagine that!
It was an a pleasant surprise. And an honour. Celebrities have gone on the show without a single call coming in… so I consider myself privileged to address the concerns of two callers. And for your benefit, I’m going to post their questions here so that you can benefit from the interview too. Here they are: (more…)
The Importance of Communication – An Interview with NUS Students October 11, 2008
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Personal Development, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.2 comments
Miscommunication
Two weeks back, I received an interview request from a group of friends who were working on a project concerning “miscommunication in the workplace”. They were keen on examining the concept of “effective communication” and “miscommunication” and gather some practical tips which students can use to enhance their ability to communicate.
I thought the questions my friends were asking would make an interesting topic for discussion. After all, we do know the dangers of communication – but how prevalent is it, and how can we avoid it? Well, that’s food for thought, and it’s the topic for today’s post! Read on! (more…)
Time and Effort Does Make a Difference September 15, 2008
Posted by Gary in Hope & Inspiration, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.add a comment
I used to laugh at him when I heard him speak in school – because he didn’t know how to.
But today – I’m impressed
It’s been close to 5 years since we last met in school. We’d been to the same schools for close to 6 years. Although we’d been in different classes, we were aware of each others’ presence – mostly because of our small cohort sizes. But she heard me speak – in public – mainly because of the time when I was tasked to appeal to the entire school – on stage – for donations for the less privileged.
She laughed at me. Or so she said.
I can’t remember – I can’t even remember what I said! I was that nervous. And I’m glad I survived that experience relatively unscathed. That’ll probably explain why I can’t remember a single thing now – because I was more interested in getting down the podium than on my message!
Speaking of stage fright!
Yet, 4 years on things things have changed.
No longer was the laughter the reaction of ridicule – it was the result of the execution of the game plan. The applause was given then not because I was about to leave the stage – but because I’d been on stage… and I noted then the vast difference that time and effort in training makes.
* * *
Ever wondered if the time and effort you put into an activity is worth it? I have. All the time!
Yet, I think every venture requires a little bit of faith and a lot of perseverance: faith to take the first step and both to help you pull through when times are tough.
For everyone who struggled or are struggling in various stages in life, or are in the process of taming those dragons in your public speaking adventure, remember this:
Your investment of time and effort is worth it!
And in the words of the 1999 World Champion of Public Speaking, Craig Valentine puts it: The very people who put you down, will be amongst the first to pat you on your back when you make it.
Keep the faith. Your time and effort will be worth it.
Speaking Rules Shot Down with Stand Up Comedy – How to Survive your First Attempt at Stand Up Comedy! August 8, 2008
Posted by Gary in Humour & Laughter, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.add a comment
It was an eye opening experience. An entertaining one too as my good friend and fellow speaker bombed on stage! It was a treat – we don’t get to see that very often! Heck, it was the first time I ever saw him bombed!
But as speakers, we understood the value of bombing, in addition to the appreciating the experience (both good and bad) of speaking on stage. The important takeaway for both of us was the educational experience – and for him, he had a bonus – stage experience to count amongst that. You see, we’d met earlier for a meeting, and we’d sat together to run through his script with us. Yes, STAND UP COMEDIANS do prepare and rehearse their material too – and the both of us were busy formulating stories and helping him polish up his jokes too.
Heck, just for the kick of it, we were preparing a contingency plan too. Together with another associate of ours, we discussed the ideal seating location too, ie where to sit. With (or without… I can’t remember anymore) we decided to seat ourselves near the door just in case he bombed incessantly on stage!
Oh fine… our contingency plan wasn’t executed when his act was delivered. But he did bomb despite using all the speaking strategies that we’ve been trained in. Being the keen Toastmasters and eager learners that we were, we sought feedback from another stand up comedian who was comparatively more experienced compared to us.
The feedback we got was startling.
The bad news was we failed for a number of reason. The good news, however, was we received lots of feedback and there were several lessons to be learned from OUR Failure.
Yes, we’ve failed so that you can benefit! Actually, to be more accurate, My friend failed for OUR BENEFIT! So we’re getting extra value here!
So let’s cut to the chase. Here were some of the lessons we managed to milk from the experience: (more…)
NUS COMMENCEMENT 2008! July 30, 2008
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.3 comments
The National University Of Singapore (NUS)’s convocation ceremony, commonly known as the Commencement ceremony, was held from 7th – 15th of July 2008, at the NUS University Cultural Centre.
To say that it was an amazing experience wouldn’t really do it much justice – especially for me and my group of friends. Before you even begin your well wishes and congratulations, I’d like to clarify first that I wasn’t among the list of proud graduates this year! Rather, I was amongst a handful of privileged presenters selected from a list of 200 to host the event’s Pre-Ceremony Show!
Yes, it was an immensely exciting and exhilarating experience, for it was the first time the 5 of us had ever worked before a camera and present a show LIVE on air.
Personally, I felt that speaking before a camera during the LIVE Show opened up a whole new spectrum of challenges where public speaking is concerned. One of it, of course, would be handling the stresses that surround you as you are required to deal and react to the flurry of activity that’s happening before you – off camera. Not only do you have to keep a lid on your own nervousness, you are also required to react as calmly and as composed as possible in reaction to changes in programme etc.
Perhaps, another challenge of doing a live show would be dealing with that fact that every little thing you’re doing would be recorded on camera and beamed to over hundreds, if not thousands of viewers seated in the hall or in the comfort of their homes over the internet.
Of course, these challenges are not exhaustive, and you could say that we asked for it when we sent in our applications and auditioned for it! Still, this was a great learning experience – and to share with you more about it, I’ve invited one of my co-hosts from the event to share some of his experience gained from working on the set.
Here’s what he has got to share:
So Anand, tell us a little something about yourself
I’m a fourth year honours undergraduate in the Faculty of Engineering at the National University of Singapore. I’ve been hosting/emceeing since JC days and I was part of my school’s debating team in secondary school. I love to explore the artistic arena and am involved in NUS drama productions as a dancer.
In addition, I’ve done a music video for a variety program for Vasantham Central in 2007. I always admire hosts and emcees as they are the ones who control the flow of events with the mic and I always learn from the experience of others.
What made you apply/try out for the position of Live Presenter for NUS Commencement 2008?
I always like to try out new stuff and love challenges. I was having loads of free time on my cards during the summer holidays and saw a good opportunity to gain further experience in the hosting arena.
Was it your first time presenting a live show? How was the experience like when you first started?
Yes! It was exciting and fun! I’ve done recorded programs before but to go on air live knowing that any errors will not be able to be cut out adds pressure to be cautious but I guess I was cool and composed to handle the pressure.
What were some problems you encountered during the live shows & how did you overcome them?
One problem I would definitely like to mention is remembering so many names, the honours terms, the professors names and who to turn the next item to on air. I learnt the art of remembering certain names and I always looked through the script before going on air. In addition, I chat with the interviewee prior to going on air just to make sure I got the names right. It was indeed fun!
How did the sessions become easier as the days went by?
It definitely becomes easier and so comfortable as you know what to do and what to expect and the events juz keeps flowing…Once u pick up the trick of the trade, ya sure to do well!
What were some of the learning lessons gained from this experience?
Firstly, you have to make the interviewee feel comfortable and at ease. Coz, once they get nervous, they tend to blabber or rather go blank. I speak to them as a friend prior to the live show and make them feel relaxed and joke with them. Secondly, I learnt to be prepared for the unexpected. For example, at the last minute while interviewing a graduate on air, I was told to interview a alumni graduate thereafter . So it really helps to be prepared mentally and with the questions up in your mind! Thirdly, the producer and video crew are your good friends. They will prompt you on the spot with cues to assist you in presenting the right names if needed and they make you look good on screen!
Tell us what was the most memorable experience you’d gotten from hosting the pre show?
The whole experience is memorable itself! It’s a great pleasure to share in the joy of the graduating students and their parents. Their aura of happiness rubs onto me. It is also great to meet talented fellow presenters and good friends in the backstage crew. The experience rocks!
Do you have any words of advice/encouragement to share with those who are afraid of speaking up in public?
Speaking in public might look difficult initially due to the many eyes on you. But, fret not and believe in yourself! That’s the key to public speaking. Be confident of yourself and know what you wana say. U are the King/Queen once you get hold of the mic! Speaking in public is an art that gets better with experience!
Bonus: Do you have anything else to share?
You will never be able to know what ya capable of unless you try it out and experience it yourself! Spread ya wings and embrace opportunities. You will truly value the experience juz like I did! Carpe Diem! Cheers!
- – - – - – - – - – -
Anand is also a free-lance host and he may be contacted at the following:
E-mail: papadamburger@hotmail.com
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=896550631
Related Posts:
Effective Emceeing
Viva Victoria! – VJC Public Speaking Bootcamp July 15, 2008
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.3 comments
It’s been over a month now… yet I still can’t get them out of my head! I’m referring to the vivacious students from Victoria Junior College!
You see, I was given the unique opportunity to conduct the 2 day public speaking bootcamp for the group of pre-university students, and it was a blast spending time with everyone at the Singapore Management University (SMU)!
I was immensely impressed with the group’s desire to learn and better themselves (more…)
Miscommunication: When “You’re Wrong” Actually Means “You’re Right!” June 25, 2008
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.add a comment
I was sharing a meal with a couple a few days back and I got to witness a hilarious spectacle – they were arguing with each other. And it all began with the word “No.”
Alright… it didn’t really begin with the word “No”. But it was the word that sparked the argument between men and wife when everything really began as an one-sided explanation to a third party (me).
You see, Denise was explaining to me some of her concerns she had about an employee of hers. Unable to comprehend her motivation for some of her actions and decisions, I enquired further. However, much of the subsequent explanation and elaboration failed to enlighten me. That was when her husband attempted to make things clearer… (more…)
