Leading Competently with the Language of Leadership September 26, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Lessons in Leadership, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.add a comment
The role of a leader is to lead. Sounds like a no-brainer huh? What is a leader if nobody chooses to follow him?
I was once told by my platoon commander when I was serving the Singapore Armed Forces that “the biggest fear a leader is to look over his shoulders and realise that nobody is following him”.
That day was the last day I left the camp and green uniform behind. But the words have stuck with me since.
In essence, it truly highlights the principle that “A Leader is only a Leader when there are people Following him”, and that a Leader is nothing without without his followers and supporters.
That begs the second question then: Why do people follow anyone else?
There are several reasons for this. But without going too deep into philosophy and/or sociology, I think that people generally follow somebody else’s lead because it is perceived that the everybody can get the job done in a better fashion.
Mind you, this does not naturally mean that the hearts and mind of the people are won and that they would follow somebody wholeheartedly. Seldom do we see something like that happen.
The power of leadership may come as a “natural endowment”, ie, people vest their trust and loyalty upon a leader voluntarily. Others may come as a form of “vested authority”, ie, authority is delegated and the leader is appointed. In effect, you can interpret it as empowerment through democracy and/or authoritative means. Each method has its merits and I won’t go into detail about that.
Yet, like it or not, a leader has to be able to wield an appropriate degree of the various leadership tools that are of both “democratic” and “authoritative” nature from time to time to get their work done.
Having worked with a fair deal of people of who were stepping into leadership roles without extensive experience of handling mega projects prior to their latest appointments, I had a quite a good time observing the similarities and differences that lie behind what makes a competent and experienced leader.
The way they communicate is one such difference. Here are some communication principles that separate competent leaders from inexperienced ones:
Why Struggle When You Can Share? August 15, 2009
Posted by Gary in Articles, Dealing with People, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.1 comment so far
Dare to Share
I got to read a really touching story in the local newspaper lately which really reminded me of the time I spent with my mother too. (See post)
Besides reminding me of my own story, I thought this article might be a worthy read for you too. Take some time to read the article below and reflect upon it and your life.
Here it is… (more…)
iImpressed @ iPresent 2009 August 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.2 comments
iPresent 2009
The bustling streets, fervor activity. I’ve long heard about their friendliness, sincerity and enthusiasm at learning. But none had really prepared me for the scenes I was to see, yet alone be part of.
I’m of course, talking about my latest training adventure at Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam.
Organised by a team of passionate and dedicated Vietnamese students, the iPresent,iLead workshop was incepted to address the mismatch of skills between young graduates and the demands of fast changing Vietnam labor market. Communication and presentation skills (hence iPresent) was identified as one of the key areas that they sought to shore up.
And boy did we have fun… training, I mean *winks*.
Over two days, two hundred students walked through the gates of the Ho Chi Minh University of Economics to gather skills on How to Overcome their Fears of Public Speaking, How to Craft an Impactful Speech, and How to Make Body Language Work For You. (more…)
5 Essential Principles You Must Know For Success on Stage July 3, 2009
Posted by Gary in Coaching, Events & Experiences, Personal Development, PowerPoint & Presentation, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.Tags: Coaching
1 comment so far
Courtesy of Flikr and "the monk"
I was coaching a friend on public speaking a couple of weeks back when we were addressing about her public speaking anxiety. In her own words, her mind would go blank, she’d freeze and get paralyzed, and she’d suffer from panic attacks thinking about her impending doom… erm… I mean presentation *winks* for weeks to come.
Sounds familiar?
Anyway, we were talking and analyzing her anxiety attacks when it dawned upon me that she held several misconceptions and “displaced faith” towards public speaking.
Now let me clarify, she’s an educated, insightful intelligent and hardworking individual who knows what she wants and what she’s doing. The only problem is that she’s been so active at avoiding speaking up for so long now that she’s forgotten how speak!
In fact, I even remarked (to her) that she has been doing a great job at whatever she’s been doing for the past couple of years! Just think about it – She’s been so successful hiding, she’s successfully taught herself to run away from speaking!
Still, more importantly, the insights and concerns she shared with me about her fear, however, helped me crystallize some of the major lessons I’ve learned about public speaking and the concept of fear! And I thought it would be great to share them with you too!
So here it goes: (more…)
Six Speaking Skills You Need For Managing a Crisis June 1, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, Public Speaking, Sales & Persuasion, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Toastmasters.add a comment
I got the privilege of evaluating an advanced project during a meeting at Tampines Changkat Toastmasters Club this evening. The project was on “Crisis Management”. The speaker was expected chair a media conference and deliver an official statement addressing a crisis that had struck the organization that he was working for. Thereafter, he would be required to chair a question and answer session from members of the media – tough interrogators who are hungry for sound bites and hawkish for answers.
The speaker had to be on his toes and watch what he said – for any slip could further stoke the flames and potentially devastate the company further.
The speaker who attempted this project for the night, Gregory Ernoult, ACB, managed this challenge admirably. In fact, it was such an admirable attempt that it helped to surface a few pertinent points in crisis/media management and prompted me to blog about it (for you) too!
Since it’s close to 4am, and I’m too tired and lazy to think of an alternative structure to share those ideas, I shall proceed simply by sharing the three main areas Greg did particularly well in followed by the three suggestions I thought he could use to enhance his presentation and Q&A. But before we begin, we’ll have to understand the setting for his “crisis” first. (more…)
The AWARE Saga – Prelude to Leadership Fatalities May 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Videos & Podcast.add a comment
Courtesy of Lucious Young
Those of you who’re in Singapore would be no stranger to the AWARE saga – an event (or some say coup) involving a Civil Society in Singapore that caught the young nation’s attention.
For those of you who are (*ahem*) unAWARE (pardon the pun), of what this is about, you may read on to find out more. Otherwise, you may skip this prelude to proceed straight to the lessons on Leadership Fatalities
Leadership Fatalities – 5 Mistakes a Leader Must Never Make! May 8, 2009
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Lessons in Leadership, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Videos & Podcast.3 comments
Image Courtesy of Channel NewsAsia
“The feeling in the room was electrifying. I still can’t get over the fact that we got Aware back. It is a great moral victory.”
- Constance Singam, past president of Aware
You would probably know the story by know. But I’d like to take the analysis of the Old Guard’s victory one step further and examine it under the microscope of communication and the fatal mistakes the New Guard made as leaders – for your benefit of course. (*winks*)
The following are 5 Leadership Fatalities that a leader must NEVER make: (more…)
Susan Boyle: A Story of Talent, Persistance and Belief April 21, 2009
Posted by Gary in General, Hope & Inspiration, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs, Videos & Podcast.1 comment so far
Who is Susan Boyle?
If I’ve said it once, I’ve must have said it a thousand times: our mindset is fundamental to our success and failure.
Wouldn’t you agree?
Our mindsets pave the way for us to move forward, allows us to pursue opportunities and open up new doors to progress… and overcome adversity and challenges.
Talent, skill and ability are irrelevant if one does not have the right attitude and mindset…
Never mind that one may harbor false hopes and misplaced beliefs every now and then – making mistakes is just another way of learning. But it’s my assertion and belief that you’ll never know until you do attempt it.
It takes courage, definitely. But you’ll be surprised what gems or golden opportunities you might uncover because you dared to venture into places that others fear to thread.
And there’s no simply no stopping you when your talent and abilities meet the opportunity.
This lady in the following video offers such a case in point. She’s almost half a century old, unemployed, and has never had the opportunity to pursue her dream of singing. And as compared to the divas that grace the stages in the modern entertainment industry… she is by far less endowed.
She is Susan Boyle – a singer-wannabe who made her an appearance on stage during the talent show Britain’s Got Talent. She was asked to share her dream – she replied: to be like Elaine Paige, a famous English singer and actress.
The judges were unconvinced. The audience laughed. Some smirked. Too many wannabes had come, boasted and failed.
Would she be another William Hung who had truly believed that in what he had to give? Let’s find out: (more…)
About the Toastmasters Club (Part 1) – What Is It and How to Join? November 20, 2008
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Toastmasters.2 comments
Speak Up at a Toastmasters Club
Are you looking for ways to enhance your public speaking skills, yet unsure of how to go about doing so?
Do you recognize the value of learning by making mistakes, yet are too afraid of making a costly mistake at work?
Are you looking for a safe and supportive environment to grow as speaker then?
If your answer is a resounding YES to any of those questions I’ve just asked, then this post’s for you! (especially if you’re residing in Singapore!)
Well, following my presentation on national radio, I felt inclined to do my bit to spread the word for the Toastmasters Movement in Singapore. I have, after all, benefited a lot from the support and advice that Toastmasters from all walks of life have given me – and if it’s helped me, I’m sure it can help you too. But just what is the Toastmasters all about? And how do you go about joining it? Are all Toastmasters Clubs the same and what are some of points I need to take into consideration before joining it?
These are just some of the questions I aim to answer in this post. Read on! (more…)
Shy Speaker’s Interview on Radio 938Live – Q&A to Share! November 1, 2008
Posted by Gary in Events & Experiences, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.add a comment
Behind the scenes at 93.9Live
And so we have it! The author of this blog got to share his views on public speaking on national radio! Now how many speakers can claim to have done that! (*winks*)
Alright, just let me bask in that moment of glory for awhile I revel in that experience. Well, to say the least, it was a really eventful experience. I was told by Stanley, the presenter and producer of the talkshow: The Living Room, to standby for a few calls to come in – it’s a Live show after all – but not to keep my hopes too up high because listeners usually don’t. He went on to add that listeners usually only call when there’s a health expert on the show…
Oh well, what the heck. Not that it really mattered. Stanley had already prepared a list of questions to ask me anyway… and so we began.
If the old adage that “Public Speaking is number one fear that supersedes the fear of death” is anything to go by, this interview certainly proved it. Because we had… not one – but two listeners who called with questions for me! Imagine that!
It was an a pleasant surprise. And an honour. Celebrities have gone on the show without a single call coming in… so I consider myself privileged to address the concerns of two callers. And for your benefit, I’m going to post their questions here so that you can benefit from the interview too. Here they are: (more…)
How to Establish Connection and Engage Your Audience like Barack Obama? October 24, 2008
Posted by Gary in Hope & Inspiration, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Videos & Podcast.add a comment
Photo: Courtesy of Mikie Bones
I’ve been following the American election race for awhile now – not for the politics, but really for the opportunity of studying the quality of speeches and strategies used by the Presidential Nominees in their during their delivery and debates. Fully aware that I’m running the risk of sounding prejudiced, I must say that Barak Obama’s speeches has so far been top-notch and his manner of delivery has been both exact and
In most cases, I think he has done a fantastic job in revving and inspiring the crowd before carrying them on-board the “Obama-Express”. His meteoric rise has not come by accident though – and I’m not surprised – I credit a large part of his success to his ability to relate, connect and engage his audience. Not only has he been able to inspire and project credibility – he has also been able to entertain and speak with humility and sincerity.
But here’s the best part of listening to his speeches: I’ve been doing my research, and I’ve identified several strategies that you and I can learn to enhance our delivery skills. It’ll probably take some getting used to, but it’s really simple to learn. All you have to do is focused is focused on ONE small word to create a BIG.
Interested to know what’s it? Well, check out the video below and read the analysis! (more…)
Body Language: What Can You Learn at the Expense of Politicians! October 19, 2008
Posted by Gary in Body Language, Image and Impressions, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Videos & Podcast.add a comment
When it comes to elections, do the body gestures of politicians mean anything?
Well – they sure do!
With elections fever all the rage in America right now – this special Body Language Report highlights and interprets some of the messages and mistakes that politicians use and make during their political rallies.
Are you interested in learning more about how you can speak with greater perceived confidence, power and credibility – and essentially enhance the clarity of your message through body language?
If your answer’s a yes, then this report is for you! It isn’t a long one (it’s just 5mins and 25 seconds), but it can raise your awareness of what are some of things to do and not to do.
So get out a piece of paper an check it out! Get ready to take some notes even!
Here it is: (more…)
The Importance of Communication – An Interview with NUS Students October 11, 2008
Posted by Gary in Dealing with People, Events & Experiences, Personal Development, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections.2 comments
Miscommunication
Two weeks back, I received an interview request from a group of friends who were working on a project concerning “miscommunication in the workplace”. They were keen on examining the concept of “effective communication” and “miscommunication” and gather some practical tips which students can use to enhance their ability to communicate.
I thought the questions my friends were asking would make an interesting topic for discussion. After all, we do know the dangers of communication – but how prevalent is it, and how can we avoid it? Well, that’s food for thought, and it’s the topic for today’s post! Read on! (more…)
Crackling Standup Comic! – Australian Baggage by Rhod Gilbert September 15, 2008
Posted by Gary in Humour & Laughter, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Videos & Podcast.1 comment so far
Alright… I couldn’t help it. It’s been one week since I last set foot in the comedy club but I haven’t been able to get the scene or the concept of stand up comedy out of my head!
In fact, I’ve been thinking about the strategies, the principles and the technique of delivery… more specifically, I’m thinking about the timing, the set up, the topics to use in a set… and who I can study to gain inspiration and insights into becoming a strong stand up comic…
Then, I found this video.
It’s a stand up comedy performance by a comedian from Wales performing in Australia. Here, have a look at it and try to keep a straight face until the end of it. Drop me a line if you can!
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I think we can all agree that the comedian did brilliantly in the manner of his delivery and set up. Did you observe how he started off all stern and serious and leading the audience towards at state of solemness.
Then at the point of intense tension – he pulled out and executed his punchline: his broken luggage handle.
Observe how the comedian delivers punchline after punchline after punchline from then onwards – it’s a series of jokes weaved seamlessly into a story. Each joke is based on the last one and each is built with the help of exaggeration, absurdity and especially the incidences of cruel irony.
Let’s see some of the principles at work with the jokes he used:
Exaggeration:
1:00: “Then this arrived…”
2:23: “I’m thrilled to get this back” … “The thing is I’ll be here for two months!”
2:58: “Surely it would have gotten very light very quickly!”
*general actions, vocal tonality and animation of points to build tension and anticipation*
Cruel Irony:
1:30: “The first three times this went around, I laughed as well!”
3:32: “Does your luggage have any distinguishing features?”
*personal reaction to loss of luggage and its ‘recovery’*
Absurdity:
2:04: Australian baggage officer’s query, “what seems to be the problem?”
2:25: I’m pretty sure I packed more than this
3:09: “Somebody packed for me and thought this is all I need?”
*concept of redundancy of airport protocol*
There’re several elements underlying the success of this stand up comic. Of the principles mentioned, his ability and sense of timing and delivery played crucial roles too, in addition to this ability utilize those tools as mentioned and more to his advantage. Very importantly too though, is his ability to conceptualise and weave his material together.
Whatever it is, however, the work that a stand up comic puts into preparing each performance is no laughing matter… and chances are, it’s going to take years, if not months, for one to get a sharper sense of what works and what doesn’t!
Still, for all you humorists out there who are seeking to have a firmer grasp of the concept of humour, continue studying comedians like Rhod Gilbert to gather more skills and techniques and sharpen your sense of timing and delivery!
Time and Effort Does Make a Difference September 15, 2008
Posted by Gary in Hope & Inspiration, Personal Development, Public Speaking, The Shy Speakers' Guide, Thoughts and Reflections, Values and Beliefs.add a comment
I used to laugh at him when I heard him speak in school – because he didn’t know how to.
But today – I’m impressed
It’s been close to 5 years since we last met in school. We’d been to the same schools for close to 6 years. Although we’d been in different classes, we were aware of each others’ presence – mostly because of our small cohort sizes. But she heard me speak – in public – mainly because of the time when I was tasked to appeal to the entire school – on stage – for donations for the less privileged.
She laughed at me. Or so she said.
I can’t remember – I can’t even remember what I said! I was that nervous. And I’m glad I survived that experience relatively unscathed. That’ll probably explain why I can’t remember a single thing now – because I was more interested in getting down the podium than on my message!
Speaking of stage fright!
Yet, 4 years on things things have changed.
No longer was the laughter the reaction of ridicule – it was the result of the execution of the game plan. The applause was given then not because I was about to leave the stage – but because I’d been on stage… and I noted then the vast difference that time and effort in training makes.
* * *
Ever wondered if the time and effort you put into an activity is worth it? I have. All the time!
Yet, I think every venture requires a little bit of faith and a lot of perseverance: faith to take the first step and both to help you pull through when times are tough.
For everyone who struggled or are struggling in various stages in life, or are in the process of taming those dragons in your public speaking adventure, remember this:
Your investment of time and effort is worth it!
And in the words of the 1999 World Champion of Public Speaking, Craig Valentine puts it: The very people who put you down, will be amongst the first to pat you on your back when you make it.
Keep the faith. Your time and effort will be worth it.
